Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Two bits, four bits, six bits a dollar...

I've had a love-hate relationship with the grocery store for as long as I can remember. I'm quite sure it goes back to my days as a child, when all of us piled into the station wagon and descended upon the store....with toddlers and babies packed into multiple grocery carts, traveling as a group, as we weaved our way through each aisle. As a parent of two children, it never ceases to amaze me how my mother accomplished all she had to do each day, surrounded by the six of us. With three little ones in diapers at one time, she kept her life choreographed very much like a military maneuver, whenever we left the house en masse. Although she and my father eventually shared the family shopping chores, I completely understand why years later, she was more than willing to turn the weekly grocery task over to me. By the time I was a teenager, I'd mastered the art of shopping for a family of eight on a stringent budget....of course I'd learned from one of the best. And, I'm pleased to report, I've passed my shopping prowess down to my daughter, who could beat me hands down in the coupon, rebate, discount shopper department. At one time, I was the refunding queen of our family...my redeemable UPC codes were organized right along side of all my coupons and grocery receipts. She has certainly taken up where I left off....just ask her to tell you the story about her unbelievable Rowenta Iron consumer triumph...there is no doubt that she is her mother's daughter.

Back to my early years of solo grocery shopping---on Saturday mornings, because I hadn't learned to drive yet, my father would drop me off at Stop Rite in Groton, with a list and a blank check. Two full grocery carts later, he picked me up and we would head back home to Ledyard. There wasn't a full service grocery store in the town where we lived, so we traveled about 20 minutes to the one that my mother had been shopping at for years. I'd made a deal with my parents, in exchange for taking on the responsibility for doing the family grocery shopping, they were allowing me to pick up the plates and glassware the store was offering at a discount. I was in the process of completing a dinnerware collection for my hope chest and with little money of my own, I had bartered my way into this arrangement. For someone who wasn't very good at math, I'd quickly figured out how to work the system to my benefit. It was a win-win situation for all the parties involved. Of course a few years later when I married and left home at 18, I had to relearn how to grocery shop for only 2 people...and, you should have seen how difficult it was for me to recalculate in my head, the difference between cooking for only 2 instead of a family of 8, but that's another story.

Over the years, I've grocery shopped in a number of different types of stores...from warehouse food distributors to our local commissary when we were still a military family. No matter how much I disliked the chore of shopping, nothing could have prepared me for my first taste of the dollar stores, when they first came on the scene. Roger and the kids always found it a fun pastime to visit the local dollar store in our neighborhood. I hated the place because they would just come home with a bunch of junk. It reminded me of cheaper version of the old Railroad Salvage store in Groton, which was never a place I liked visiting. It must have something to do with those aisles upon never-ending aisles...I see them and just want to turn around a run the other way.

Even after we moved to Florida, Roger could not get me into a dollar store...he and Stacey could spend hours roaming the store finding all kinds of bargains. All of that changed, when we relocated a bit further north and I discovered 99cent Stuff...the dollar store to beat all dollar stores...because they had REAL food, not just the junky stuff in cellophane packages. They sold vegetables, fruit, eggs, cheese and even frozen food...FOR A DOLLAR!!! I was in my glory for the next few years, until sadly they closed their doors...it was horrible and I miss it terribly. My days of buying 10-20 cartons at a time, of fresh berries for $1 each were over. I'd fill the freezer whenever that type of produce was available. I loved the store and it had helped me to overcome my strong dislike of all things grocery store related. It was smaller than the average food store, more like the size of a CVS or Walgreens. I could easily spend an enjoyable hour looking through the junky aisles, on my way to the food section, my years of slogging through superfood chain stores a distant memory.

I've found a lesser exciting, smaller replacement dollar store, just a block over from where my old one used to be...it's not quite the same, but it will do in a pinch. No fresh veggies or fruit, however, the frozen substitutes are available if necessary. I've resigned myself to the fact that I still need to stop at Publix each week to stock up on produce. I continue to enjoy spending 30 minutes leisurely strolling through Dollar Tree, and never leave without my basket full of goodies. Our cupboards and kitchen drawers are full of the proof that you don't nave to spend a lot to meet the everyday needs of the average family. Why pay more when you can get it all for only $1?


Although I prefer to eat mostly fresh foods, we keep the pantry stocked for Roger's lunches and storm hurricane season


Prepackage baking products for muffins, waffles and canned goods for Roger's veggie mixtures he loves to make


We always have a full supply of these

I was the one who turned my nose up at the dollar store, and although my husband and daughter urged me to give it a try, I thought only other people shopped in there. Once I became a convert, and attempted to share the information with my friends, I found they never understood or could grasp the concept, no matter how many times I showed them the hearty healthy meals, I'd packed for my lunches. Although I love going to Whole Foods to shop as much as the next person, this week I brought home all kinds of ingredients for holiday baking from Dollar Tree. You don't have to be on a strict budget to know, it just makes sense to spend less on the extras, around this time of the year.


I rarely bake so most of this is never in the house...around the holidays, I make the effort :)

Even though I was raised in the country, I was actually born in the city like my parents before me. The love of the small, family owned neighborhood grocery store of past generations, is truly in my blood. When my mother was a child growing up during the depression, her father owned such a grocery store, which was located on the first floor of their home on 7th Avenue in Brooklyn. My mother was the youngest of 6 and learned how to stretch a dollar from her parents, so it stands to reason she would pass her lessons of thriftiness on to her own children.

After 5 years of being a dedicated dollar store shopper, unless I find myself in a pinch, I still refuse to pay more than a dollar for any of the following items....

Kleenex
Q-tips
Toothpaste
Hair spray
Dental floss
Package of bars of soap
Toilet paper
Paper towels
Cleaning solution
Zippered baggies
Plastic wrap
Aluminum foil
Knee-hi pantyhose
Socks
Bleach
English muffins
Frozen veggies
Bagels
Chicken breast/thighs
Boxed mixes
Napkins
Paper plates
Gum
Candy
Chips
Crackers
Popcorn
Pretzels
Holiday decorations
Wrapping paper
Gift bags
Helium balloons
Cookies
Pasta
Tuna
Condiments
Combs
Mirrors
Tape
Scissors
Paper pads
Photo frames
Over the counter medications
Chapstick
Spices
Drinking glasses
Coffee mugs
Dishes
Books fiction/non fiction...the list goes on an on....



These are always useful to have around...again...why pay more than a dollar?



Another mainstay for Roger if we don't find the time to stop for the local produce


I'm amazed at the meat that they carry...Roger cooks his meals and loves it


Yes, they have decent cheese there too...you never know what treats will be waiting, so I buy in large quantities whenever possible

I'm no longer a dollar store snob, nor do I care about name brand products. I can recall the age of generic, no-name groceries on the shelves and how they were the first sign that we as consumers finally had a choice to either pay the standing mark-up for a popular well-known manufactures' item, or not. I've chosen the path of least resistance, no coupons, no rebates and no more refunding...just don't take away my dollar stores and I'll be a happy camper into my golden years.


So, the next time you drive by your local dollar store, stop for a few minutes and take a look around. If you are lucky enough to find a great bargain...don't be a snob or ashamed of where you found it.... share your good news with others....just stand up and holler!!!

Monday, November 29, 2010

One potato, two potato, three potato...four

In my world two plus two just does not always equal four. Although I am being a bit over dramatic, I truly am horrific with math and always have been. It's a family joke that I have no concept of abstract numbers and yet I've lived with a man for 33 years who can remember the license plate number of his very first car. And, to make matters worse for me (mom would NOT be helping with math homework) but certainly not for them, I gave birth to two math geniuses, who put me to shame everyday they brought home high grades in that particular subject. My daughter loved math so much as a student, she went on to study it further in college, and then recently returned to school to obtain her masters in business finance. I'm so pleased that neither of my children struggled through the world of numbers like their mother.


The woman who makes her parents proud of every single one her accomplishments

It is never more apparent to me how badly I mangle numbers, than when I go back to revise something as simple as the date and years of certain events in my life. Granted some I want to remember, and others I block out as a defense mechanism. I totally botched the dates surrounding my father's passing when I featured him in my blog this past week. It's usually my astute husband who says, "honey, you may want to revise that year, and then change the total from..." you get the idea. I'd always said I wanted my blogging to be raw, without input from others, and/or another set of eyes for proofing, well I can promise...it certainly comes to you uncensored. And unfortunately, if you are looking forward to my accuracy regrading numbers...you are fresh outta luck. I am able to go back and make changes...so for anyone who may have read the original version (in other words just about everyone), I apologize for my oversight. This is who I am, no sugar coating...just the facts...the good, the bad and the sometimes ugly truth.

In many instances, I'm more anxious to get my thoughts down, than I am with addition and subtraction. And, unfortunately, I have absolutely, positively, no memory for numbers either...not only do I lack an aptitude for basic math...I can't remember a number to save my life. I honestly believe it is a form of dyslexia, in my mind, the numbers move around, the way I see them in the page, does not translate to how I store them in my head. This has occurred since my early years of learning, back when we were required to memorize the multiplication tables. To complicate matters in my young mind, when I was in catholic school, we actually had this strange little contraption called an abacus, to help us learn math...clearly I failed miserably with that little apparatus, and just never mastered the subject. I had no desire to become friends with the numbered world, and chose instead to devote all of my time to my first love, reading. Let's face facts, in my mind, Algebra was just a dirty word and something I wanted no part of....eventually I'd get my wish...we never did have a mutual admiration for each other....math went one way and I chose the other.


The young student who would never completely feel the need to understand why numbers were so important

When I think back to my years in school, perhaps instead of drilling me on my spelling words while I was drying the dishes each night, I should have had my father test me on my math lessons. I'm sure he probably did, I just prefer to put those unpleasant memories out of my mind. I remember when I entered Jr. High School, they were trying to introduce the metric system into the curriculum...oh brother was I in for a load of trouble!!! As with most math, I just flubbed my way through it, hoping it would all go away...well at least with the metric system I was right...the necessity and use soon fell by the wayside. If I had picked up even a small amount of an understanding for the system, it actually would have come in handy when we lived overseas and the world did revolve around me in metric numbers. I found a way to survive for those three years, I'd just ask Roger to convert everything for me. Liters, meters, and kilos.....just a foreign language I had no desire to learn. I actually had a much easier time of learning German....the written and the spoken word have never been a problem for me, unless of course it involved doing my homework....but that's another story.

If you are having difficulty understanding any of what I'm working towards...I'll make it very simple....I was a very average student, with only one goal in mind, to graduate and get the heck out of school. Thank goodness, neither of my children followed in my footsteps and were very good students....and luckily for both of them, learning never appeared to be a difficult task. As a parent, I was more than pleased to note that they enjoyed being in school, except for that time Brian tried to get off the bus and run back into the house...but I'm thinking he was just a little guy at the time and it was more about separation from his Mom than his dislike of learning new things. He eventually went on to finish his college education a semester early and has had a very successful career employed in his chosen field. He knew as a very young student, that he had an affinity for computers, and loves working with them, as he has for most of his life.


Brian knew at this very young age, he loved computers...how cool is that???

Please understand that my current use of math is not a struggle, I've made my peace with the world of numbers, and am quite comfortable with them, just don't ask me to do any long division!!!. I find that having a calculator close by always helps to soften the blow, when trying to work on monthly expense reports at work. Although it was never in the cards for me to go beyond basic Algebra in high school, I found that I did love and excelled in both computer class and biology...and I was holding my own in bookkeeping until the second semester, when Roger was transferred into my class and seated directly behind me, but that's another story. Interestingly enough, I'm the one in our family who is responsible for keeping track of our finances....pretty scary thought. But then again, I'm also the one who can find the most inexpensively reduced items, and once in a great while, I'm able to locate a great coupon and/or a rebate. Not so bad for a kindergarten drop out....oh did I forget to mention that halfway through my very first year of schooling, I woke up one day and just told my mom I didn't want to go back, and because it was not mandatory at the time, she let me stay home. I'm thinking that probably wasn't a very good idea....lesson learned, if at first you don't succeed, try try again...and please find a way to love your numbers, I have!


Have no fear, most everything I do at work uses the reading and writing part of my brain...the arithmetic I leave to the calculator...as it should be!!!

Sunday, November 28, 2010

Let it Snow, Let it Snow, Let it Snow...OH NO!!!!

I think I need to stop listening to Christmas songs...getting myself into trouble here!!!


I am doing something I have not attempted in 10 years since we moved to FL....I'm traveling north to New England in December...pretty scary for someone who doesn't do cold anymore. Just a quick late Friday to late Sunday 2-night trip, but it looks like the odds are against me...there is a 30% chance a bit of the white stuff may fall from the sky before the end of my weekend in Boston.

Roger, the weatherman in our family, keeps sending me the updated 10-day weather forecast...thanks honey...I APPRECIATE your meteorological diligence...please do your best to remove the snowflakes from my computer screen...they are most unwelcome.

Not to say we have not seen snow falling out of the sky since we've moved to FL, in October of 2001, while flying to CA, we were rerouted through Minneapolis and were shocked to see snow coming down, as we glanced through the airport windows.

And, not to say that I have not felt snow beneath my feet in the last 10 years either...the last week of April in 2009, the six of us all ventured to New Hampshire to visit Roger's parents. I was shocked to see the large solid pile of snow in the back yard, that my father-in-law had saved for us. Well, not really, but it sure sounded good...oh there was a clump there all right...he just hadn't been saving it for anyone, least of all us. You must understand that the northern regions of New England get so much snowfall during the course of one winter, that it just gets piled up all over the place. This particular stack of snow, just took a bit longer to melt than any of the others. We got such a kick out of seeing snow in April, Roger and I both insisted on posing for pictures standing on top of it...you'd think we'd never seen the stuff before. What a couple of hicks from the south!


I could feel the damp cold through my shoes...don't you just LOVE dirty old snow?!?! Yuck :(


You can take the boy out of New England.....but his heart remains in Boston with his beloved Red Sox...I mean daughter...I'm really not kidding....he'd move there in a New York...oops, another slip of the tongue....Massachusetts minute

What made the whole "pile of snow in NH in late April" even more ironic...I was visiting up north to take part in a marathon later that week in NYC and there was such a record breaking heat wave, they shortened the full marathon to a half for the runners, and a half to a quarter for the walkers....stranger things have happened...but not to me!!!!


Sun tan lotion anyone? Didn't I just have a turtleneck on yesterday....the crazy spring weather in the nether regions of the northern states...I'll take my hot muggy south FL any day...at least it's pretty consistent....hot today, followed by hot tomorrow and then a bit more heat in the 10-day forecast...ah yes...my home :)

Last Thanksgiving, Roger and I attempted something we'd never done before...we decided to spend 10 days on the road together, in a car traveling through four of the southern gulf states. And guess what....we ran into some "snow" HUH???


Outside of Harrah's Casino in New Orleans, they'd set up a "winter wonderland" scene complete with "snow" and since I'm such a big "fan" of the white stuff... I couldn't resist posing for a few pictures...


The irony of it all...and yes that is a shit eating grin on my face...it was windy and very cold (at least to me) during most of our stay in NOLA...so I did freeze my butt off even without any real snow entering into the equation.


I had two layers on under my suede jacket, then the scarf around my neck and the wrap around everything, to keep in what little warmth my poor body could generate...what I needed was a pair of gloves...my hands were freezing and that wrap was just not cutting it....have I mentioned I don't like to be cold????

So, as I unpack my suitcase from last weekend's cruise...think sundresses, flip flops and capris...and hunt down my gloves, turtlenecks, boots and leather coat, I look forward to frostbitten fingers....ooops, I mean giving my daughter a big hug and a kiss when I see her sweet face in less than 7 days. Seriously, I'm honestly kidding. A little cold now and again for these old bones is a good thing...it truly makes me appreciate all that Stacey, Scott, Taryn and Brian go through each winter as the seasons change and they struggle to survive the icy cold northern temperatures. I've done it all, seen my share of snow storms and ice storms...gotten stranded on a highway with a frozen battery, in the dead of winter with two toddlers in the back seat and even skidded down an ice covered hill at midnight and destroyed my mother's car a week before my own wedding.


I ALWAYS have more clothes on than anyone else...outside party on the lake in northern Michigan, Sept. 25th, the night before Taryn & Brian's wedding. Me in a turtleneck, furry vest, warm pants and boots...almost everyone else, skimpy dresses and sandals...who do you think was warmer when the sun went down???


Stacey showing me that even before day turned to night, she could see her breath...we were all in for a chilly evening....come on folks, it's NORTHERN Michigan at the end of September!


Although it did get very crowded around that fire pit later that night, I'm guessing the folks were kept a bit warm by the free flowing alcohol everyone was enjoying :) it was an incredible evening, followed be an even more incredible day..hard to believe more than a year has gone by.

In closing, I make this simple request....during this holiday season, the next time you hear those familiar words coming from the radio or your favorite Christmas CD, think of me enjoying the 60's in the mornings and the 80's (still????) at noon...and be careful what you wish for because the weather has never been perfect in ANYPLACE I've ever lived!

Oh the weather outside is frightful....

Saturday, November 27, 2010

The legacy he left for all of us

In no particular order....my Father through the years...


Dad, Jim and me


Dad and his crew--Jack, Joanne, Jim, Jerry, Justine and Jeff


Dad, Justine, Jeff and Jerry


Dad and his crew in our backyard pool--Ledyard


Dad and his crew, with a neighbor kid thrown in for good measure...what's one more?


Dad and his Mother


Mom and Dad


Dad, Justine, Jeff and me (love the swim cap)


Dad, Justine, Jim, Jerry and Jeff


Mom, Dad, Jim and me--what a lovely little child I was!


Dad and Jack--Ledyard


Dad and Pat--he was never one to miss an opportunity to show off


Dad and John--his namesake grandson--Groton


When Stacey was born, my parents traveled to Germany to welcome their 1st grandchild into the family and to celebrate my 20th birthday


Dad cooking up a storm


He encouraged us to use our minds, even when playing a game


Unlike both my parents, I never found it within me to get up on stage-- behind the scenes with Dad and part of the paint crew


Dad and Brian--1st communion--Niantic


Mom, Dad and Pat--my parents remained friends after he remarried


Dad, Stacey and Brian--Stacey's college graduation--Westbrook--2001


Our last Thanksgiving with my Father--2002


Dad and Stacey-very proud grandpa--1979


Dad, Stacey and me--his 60th birthday party--Old Lyme--1994


Walking me down the aisle--1978


A cigar I brought from Washington DC in 8th grade--he promised to smoke it on my wedding day


Stacey, Justine, Dad and me--home for the holidays--1983


Pat and Dad--Justine's wedding--New London


Dad and me--Christmas Brunch at my house--he was always everyone's Santa


Dad and his boys


Dad, Jeff and Justine--Jim on the floor


Dad--growing up in Brooklyn, NY


Mom and Dad dating--Josephine Grado & John Joseph


Dad (white trunks) and friend--lifeguard duty


Stacey, Roger, Brian and me--Oct 2003--CT


The last time I saw my father before he passed away Oct 2003--Groton


Each year he would send a card with a note for my birthday...I treasure the sentiment and his final written words to me